Where does a Rottweiller sit in the cinema ?
Anywhere it wants to !

What kind of dog chases anything red ?
A bull dog !

What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals ?
A guard dog !

What do you call a dog in jeans and a sweater ?
A plain clothes police dog !

What do you get when you cross a sled dog with an elephant?
A tusky!

When is a black dog not a black dog ?
When it's a greyhound !

Every time I tell my English Setter to stop barking, it never does!
What does it do?
It just stands on its back two legs and quotes Shakespeare!
What?
Yeah, it says, "To bark or not to bark that is the question!" and keeps on barking!

What kind of dog doesn't do well in hot weather?
A faint Bernard!

Why didn't the German shepherd bark when the robber broke into the house?
It had laryngitis!

What is the best kind of dog to direct traffic at a busy intersection?
A pointer!